#Dungeon23 is about making a megadungeon throughout 2023, one location per day. I’m joining in.

Like photo-a-day, selfie-a-month, and landscape-painting-a-fortnight activities I’ve joined before, I expect this fad to last no more than a few days. But perhaps 2023 will be different?

You see, last night I had an idea. An idea for an Electric Bastionland megadungeon.

9 months ago, noted surgical-tools magnate The Very Mentionable Theophilus Q. Trocad Snr., lost his only daughter, Madamoiselle Cadero I. Trocad III, due to a tragic accident during her 47th plastic surgery operation. “The World will not forget my Cadero’s name”, Trocad told an assembly of press and radio journalists at the time, “you will all see, I shall build an incomparable public monument to her memory, This shall be my great gift to humanity, to the people of Bastion. This will show that Cadero did not die in vain.”

After 9 months under a very large dustsheet, the latest addition to Bastion’s downtown shopping district has been revealed: THE CADERO, a bulbous monolith (a little like a bakelite version of the Sage Gateshead) housing a bloated shopping mall.

The Cadero is 416 feet high and about half-a-mile long, with 365 locations across 8 levels above ground (including 3 shopping galleries and a private members’ club) and 3 basement levels (with a not-at-all-hard-to-navigate car park, and easy-ish connections across Bastion, via the Underground). Everything you desire, all under one roof! (Please note, due to delays with contractors the Gorkinson’s Department Store in the East Wing is not yet open).

The Cadero: level 1 draft floor plan

What is that shopper looking for? (d66)

11: A map of the mall
12: A lost child
13: The information desk
14: An escalator?
15: The ice rink
16: The car park

21: Somewhere to eat
22: Somewhere to drink
23: Somewhere to pray
24: A remote working space
25: The soft play area
26: Somewhere, anywhere, quiet

31: Workwear
32: Outdoorsy clothes
33: Underwear
34: Partywear
35: Surgicalwear
36: An item of clothing for a relative of unknown size

41: A haircut
42: A shoeshine
43: A makeover
44: A chiropractor
45: A dentist
46: A plastic surgeon

51: Someone who’s in charge here
52: Security staff
53: A personal shopper
54: A mandrill mockery
55: A gullible passer-by
56: A jar of BBQ-spiced chicken stock

61: A pocket watch
62: A set of saucepans
63: A spare part for a combined gramaphone and radio set
64: A very particular book
65: Three planks of wood (assorted sizes), a hammer, and a pot of nails
66: Chewing gum



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